First.

Well, first entry. First entries are always a little awkward. You're never 100% sure if anyones ever going to read it, so it's hard to find what to say to yourself. I already know myself, so an introduction would be a little unnecessary. I guess that I could always use it as a time line. You know, to look back and see where I was at this point in my life. Really kind of boring, but still, possibly worth having noted on some blog for future reference.

Anyway. I'll be 24 in less than a month. That's a little intimidating. The good thing is, I feel like I am on the right path. Fucking finally! It's taken me 15 years of fucking up to get to this point. OK, maybe not "fucking up" but damn well close. I have a good job lined up and I'm going to renew my RE license. I feel like the market for houses is about to crash, which means lot's of selling. So, right now would be the perfect time to get into it and have a little extra money every month. I plan on going back to college too but that will take some time. I am actually switching schools, so once I register, I'm good to go. I'm pretty sure my focus will remain in business but who knows, and that's just it, I don't know. Business seems like the best option if you don't know, just not the math part. I was also considering sociology but mostly because I'm lazy and that's an easy degree, to be honest. There aren't too many career paths in the sociology field. I could be a social worker but that's really sad and not so high on the financial end. Oh well.

Things with Joey and I are going well. Although we tend to get in really stupid arguments. I think because distance and love are two really hard things to push together, they don't mesh well. It's also hard when you have to put so much more effort into something, when you see people who have it easy. Such is life, I suppose. The great part is though, I truly and I mean truly, love someone. With everything I have, I want this to work. So, I'm willing to try harder, it just gets hard. Right now I am hoping it gets easier with my focusing on myself. I will be heading out there next Friday. I can't wait, more so because I get to eat fried pickles! That and lot's of behind closed doors kind of stuff, if you catch my drift.

Anna is growing everyday. She gets more and more independent everyday. It's so bittersweet. I want her to always need me. I wish at times I was more motherly to her. Not that I'm not, I just feel like I could be more. She is so smart and so full of life. It's surreal to watch children grow, hard to believe I was just like her once. So innocent and so appreciative for the small things in life. It scares me to think she will one day have to face this scary world we live in. I'm not ready and don't think I will ever be ready for her to have to deal with the problems this world has.

I guess thats all for tonight. I have to work in the morning.